Christmas Crossroads

When do you stop adding your grown up children to the family Christmas card? Especially when it comes to photo Christmas cards. 

When they are living out on their own? When they get married? What happens if they never get married? This has been my Christmas dilemma. And this is why you won't be receiving a Christmas card from The Smith Family this year.

Normally I'm all over our Christmas cards well in advance. Envelopes are addressed and ready to be sent to Noel, MO post office for that extra special magical Christmas touch. Cards arrive well before Christmas and I have yet again, stayed ahead of my Christmas schedule. But this year I felt so guilty about leaving off our older children from the Christmas card, that I never did settle on my decision. Leave them on or off? It's more than just their names, it's all of them! 

For most Mom's leaving out our children from any greeting card is like throwing away their art work. You completely feel like you are abandoning them! For myself, I was absolutely worried that it would look like favoritism. Why only a photo of Mary Kate and Will? Where are Ryan and Matthew? Why aren't their names even on the card? Dreaded questions I hated to answer, because you know people are going to ask. Some will understand, others won't. And those that don't understand just love to make you feel horrible about your life choices. Then you're left to feel bad about yourself not only as a human but as Mom. Even though your intentions were pure and you are simply trying to let your older children grow up and let them send out their Christmas cards if they'd like. 

But nothing can never come easily, at least not in my world. My life is a living damned if you do, damned if you don't continuous loop. I cannot win. So instead I'm going to talk with my older children during our Christmas Eve festivities and ask their opinions. Not Facebook, not other Moms, I'm asking the people that matter most, Ryan and Matthew. Face expressions can tell me far more than a text or phone call. And I want to make sure that any decision I make for our family isn't hurting anyone...ESPECIALLY during Christmas. 

So if you are like me and at a Christmas crossroads, hoping to get those precious family Christmas cards delivered by Christmas, try not to stress about it. One Christmas not sending out cards isn't the end of the world. But do ask yourself the above questions and then talk it over with the ones who will potentially left off of the Christmas card. Christmas is about love, family, togetherness and most importantly the birth of our Savior. Don't let Christmas get ruined over a card. 

Merry Christmas!

Kat

By the way...Yes, I'm aware I can always send out regular Christmas cards and just write The Smith Family...problem solved. But I'm talking photo cards:)

Pen Pal Cousins

I have always loved writing letters. I love the feel of paper, the way a pen glides across the page, the sound of a pencil as it scribbles words. Writing letters is slowly becoming a lost art.  Emails are being sent, updates are given on Facebook, pictures are being posted on Instagram, and lets not forget texts and tweets. Communication is convenient these days. 

My kids go to school with a lot of kids who at 8 & 9 years old have cell phones. Mark and I won't allow our younger children to have cell phones for our own personal beliefs. I'm an older parent in the kids' school and I am very much an old school, old soul parent too. I try to teach my kids to appreciate the simple things in life. We like growing our food, getting our hands dirty, we like taking walks, we like unplugging, we like having lemonade stands, we like board games and card games, we like playing with lego and barbies. We like spending our time swimming during the day 

and gathering around the fire pit at night. 

We love simple. Cell phones will always be there, 

but these moments are fleeting.

Distance can't keep these two apart. Mary Kate lives in Arkansas and Keely lives in California.

And that's what gravitates me to sharing with my kids the lost art of actually writing letters...do you remember what it was like receiving a special letter in the mail? 

The excitement of checking the mailbox, seeing an envelope addressed to you. 

For those few brief moments you feel special, you feel excited and most of all you feel loved. 

Because someone took the time out of their day to write a letter to you. 

Letters will always be far more personal than any Facebook update, any Instagram post, text, tweet or email. Letters contain words written by someone's hand. They had to think of what they wanted to say before they said it, they had to have the supplies to write the letter. So much more goes into letter writing than anything else. 

These two girls are animal lovers. Mary Kate wants to be a vet and Keely wants to be a farmer!
Maybe they can work with each other one day!

And that's why my Sister-In-Law, Katy, and I are teaching our daughters to write letters. We have started something fun for them to share with each other by becoming Pen Pal Cousins, writing letters back and forth to each other. You see, just like me, Katy is an old soul and we love things like this. Sure it adds more to our already busy lives, but this is something we know will be special for our girls as they grow up. Mary Kate and I are even going to put the letters from cousin Keely in their own special pretty box. So Mary Kate will always know where they are and one day she will be able to look back on them and reminiscence with her cousin. And overall, it will help build their relationship to be stronger. It's my prayer and hope that even though our sweet daughters are far away, that their relationship will be a close one.

Friends Forever

As I was talking to Mary Kate about starting her letter to Keely, I realized, I had to actually teach my daughter how to write a letter. Mary Kate was full of questions, "Why do we ask how are you?" "What am I supposed to say?" "Why would she want to know about my basketball team?" I had to explain to her that these are things about our lives that we might find boring or mundane but others might find fun and exciting. They learn things about us that we didn't realize they never knew. And we ask how are you because that shows we care and that we've been thinking about them. 

The plan is, sometimes we'll send just a letter, sometimes we'll send a little trinket with a short note, sometimes we'll send a care package of some of MK's favorite things from Arkansas, we'll send postcards from places we visit big or small....we'll have fun with this and that's what matters most. We want this to be a positive experience for our daughters. Something they always look forward to. We want this to be something (we hope) our daughters 

continue to do on their own as they grow older. Even after they get their own cell phones one day! I said I hope...LOL! 

I'll write back soon!

The Balancing Act: Alone Time and Family Time

How is the weekend over already? I feel like it flew by in a flash and all I want is for it to start over!
I feel like the days are going by quicker and quicker and I'm desperate to slow them down. I see my children growing up, some are dating, some are getting taller, some are talking about careers and I sometimes feel like I'm still that 20 something young lady still trying to figure it out myself. It almost feels like a snow-globe. I'm standing still and life is a blizzard whirling around me.

This weekend was your typical, regular weekend, but it also felt like a long weekend. We squeezed in a lot for a short time! For once, time and life seemed to slow down.

Fridays always begin with a coffee date for Mark and me. We go to Bolder Coffee in Rogers after one of us drops off the kids, we get our favorite coffee drinks and we split a muffin. Mark catches me up on all things brewery and I give him a ton of unsolicited advice and options. It's the job of a wife that never ends, or gets old....for me at least.

It's the little moments we steal as husband and wife
that make a big difference in our marriage.

**Side note: For a long time Mark and I used to make all sorts of time for date nights (benefits of a built in babysitter, AKA older brother) and for awhile we really haven't taken many date nights. We go out to eat as a family but really haven't been making time for us. And I really wanted a proper date night. "Let's dress up and go out and do something different!" That's what I wanted and what we needed. Sometimes in a marriage life can quickly go from exciting to auto-pilot. Moving through the motions is fine at times but then when you see your partner is off auto-pilot and living life without you, you  start feeling a tad resentful. His life is full and exciting and yours is boring...very, very boring. Then loneliness sets in. And then fights begin. And that's where we were. However, we nipped it in the bud real quick and agreed that we need to reconnect. So this weekend was about us, family and loving each other and making time for each other as often as we could. Marriage is WORK. And marriage doesn't work without COMMUNICATION and UNDERSTANDING. You have to HEAR your partner and LISTEN to them if you want your marriage to work. You have to make TIME for each other, without the children. You have to remember why you fell in love in the first place and keep that love alive somehow.**

That night Mark and I hired the world's best babysitter, our niece Lyndsey. I picked her up from school, while Mark picked up pizzas for the kiddos. We headed out before 6pm and made our first stop at a super fun place called Cannibal & Craft. AKA, Tiki Bar!!!! Mark loves tiki bars and I love watching him geek out at them! However, if that tiki bar does not play tiki music, it will drive him insane. He wants the whole full on tiki bar, experience. And I completely agree with him! Who wants to listen to Rap music at a tiki bar?? Music can reuin the experience, no matter how great the atmosphere is. Think about it, if you go to Hawaii and you're at luau, do you want to listen to Rap music or do you want to listen to luau tiki music? Other than the very disappointing playlist, the place was really amazing. Drinks were spot on and the decor was perfection. We will go back but probably when it's later in the evening. We went a little too early like some parents on a rare date night.

A tiki bar in Fayetteville, AR of all places!

Decor was absolutely fun and perfect.

We were a little too ambitious and took on a fish bowl.
We didn't even finish half of it. Our age was showing big time!

I don't have a picture of where we went to eat at, but we went to the Old Post Office for dinner. It was okay-I guess I was expecting something more since there was a line. It's basically like Grubs-but a little better. Would I go back? Maybe, but it wouldn't be first on my list. The highlight for us was running into my Aunt, Uncle and Cousins!

Then we went to a pinball bar called Pinpoint. It was so much fun playing pinball on the old machines. Pinball machines always bring back memories of staying at a hotel on vacation and going to the back game room to play on the pinball machines. The smell of chlorine of the pool and the vending machines of candy, chips and soda waiting to be bought. It's childhood for me, it's a warm memory for me that I love so much. So if you get a chance to go, you gotta go. It's nothing fancy. I was expecting it to be swanky for sure. But it was like a basement with a bar and pinball machines. Don't bring the kids-this an adults only pinball bar.

Pinball machines everywhere and it wasn't busy on Friday night.

Star Wars was really fun to play.

After that we went for drinks at The Vault and again, no pictures. Not because it wasn't great, because it was! It was dark and I didn't get any good pictures for my blog. It's a bar literally in a old bank vault. It's small, cozy but very open. I ordered a gin and tonic that didn't necessarily taste like a gin and tonic but it was still good. I'm very old...school and I like my drinks as is, not swanky. Theirs was swanky.

After that we went home and called it a night by 10pm. We did a lot in a few short hours and had a good time. My God we are old.

The next day we went to the lake to celebrate our girl, Kinsey! Our niece was turning 19 and we weren't going to miss celebrating with her. Kinsey is a hardworking girl who we are just so proud of! She's going into the medical field as a surgical tech. She is always working and putting her way through school. So we all gathered at the lake while my parents are camping to celebrate Kinsey.

The perfect gift for the birthday girl and future surgical tech.

Kinsey and her boyfriend, Trent.

Everyone was there, other than our Ryan. He wasn't feeling so well plus he's also working 3rd shift now and so it's taking a little time for his body to adjust to his now hours. And Marc wasn't there-he usually doesn't come out to family events.

Glasgow Gathering

Girl talk around the table with the birthday girl.

My favorite couple, Matt and Alison.

Everyone had a good time at the campgrounds with Kinsey. Chris took Will out on the canoe to fish and then the guys cooked, kids played baseball, the guys played corn hole. It was a great night! Not too hot, not too buggy out. It was perfection. Today is Kinsey's actual birthday and I hope she had a wonderful party at the lake. We love you Kinsey and we love this family of ours!

Will and Chris-thank you for taking Will out!

Will wants one now!

My corn hole champ-even if he loses:)

Chris winning at corn hole!

Now that's a fire! Dad and Mark cooked for everyone.

He'll always love playing baseball with his Daddy.

Marriage is work, family is work. But like they say "work hard, play hard." That just doesn't apply to actual jobs. It applies to all aspects of life and we worked hard at it this past weekend and played a lot too.

Our Sunday ended with Mark taking a trip to Missouri to pick up some chairs for the brewery with our head brewer, Will-not our son Will. He's too little to brew. Ha! I cleaned up Mark's office while they were away, and then ended our weekend with a migraine. Ugh. But it was a good weekend of balancing it all. Balancing Mark and me, balancing time with family. It's all worth it. Well, my head is hurting again and I need to do laundry. So I'm going to end it here...

A truck full of chairs at a bargain for our brewery.

I hope everyone has a beautiful week! Take care of yourself, your relationships and be apart of moments as much as you can be. Balance.

  

All of August

 Welcome September! Yes, I know it's odd to have a post titled "All of August" and immediately start talking about September. But, oh my goodness, am I ever glad September is here! August was a BUSY month for us and it's spilling over into September as we speak. Nobody ever told me as we got older, our days would get busier too. I feel like there is never enough hours in the day to accomplish what I want to. And there is so much to be done-and I'm a stay at home Mom! God bless the working Mom's out there who have to do it all and more! My to-do list is only getting longer because things just keep piling up on each other. So hopefully September will bring me a little relief after the 14th and let me catch up on that list.

So why was August so busy for us? Well, first it was back to school. That's a whole thing within itself. Meeting the teachers, school supply shopping, clothes shopping, getting back into routines and saying goodbye to our beloved summer that went by way too quickly. I also volunteered to be SAG chairperson this year for our PTA. SAG stands for Staff Appreciation Group. I make sure staff has food for busy times like Welcome Back to School, Parent Teacher Conferences, Teacher Appreciation, etc. So far I've pulled off one successful SAG event and the next will be for Parent Teacher Conferences. I was lucky enough to get donations from several local bakeries, I baked some goodies myself and everyone really loved it! I hope Parent Teacher Conferences go off just as smoothly.

A fun letter board to Welcome Staff Back to School.

A sweet spread of treats! Cookies donated by Rick's Bakery in Rogers.

Cream Horns made by me.

Cookie Dough donated by Bliss Cupcakes in Rogers.

Donuts from Rick's Bakery in Rogers.

Cake balls donated by Bliss Cupcakes in Rogers.

Cupcakes donated by Bliss Cupcakes in Rogers.

Apple sugar cookies made by me.

However, before that, we sent Matthew back to school and now he's in his own dorm room, that looks more like a little apartment. It's super cute and he's loving it. I do wish he had a roommate, though. It's always good to surround yourself with people. But he's an introvert who likes his space and I get that. In the end I'm super excited and proud of him. Our oldest son, Ryan, also decided to go back to school. He's taking on-line classes and working third shift. Yikes! I worked third shift for years and it's exhausting. But he has it figured out. And like, Matthew, I am very proud of him and excited for this next chapter in his life. I can't believe I have two college men now! My goodness, they make me proud!

The view outside of Matt's dorm is of the Razorback Stadium! Awesome view!

Big man on campus! Matt is so excited for this year!

The first day back to school was also my daughter's 9th Birthday! So I had to make sure her first day back to school Birthday was memorable. I felt so bad for her, having her birthday on the first day back but she was so excited! She's never celebrated her Birthday with her friends at school {once in preschool-but elementary school is much different}and so she was thrilled! I went all out for my girl too! We had a party with family on one weekend, my Aunt provided a sign for our front yard on her actual birthday, and then we had a party with her friends on another weekend. Her birthday was celebrated almost the whole month of August and she loved it! It was exhausting for me but so worth it! I can't believe I have a 9 year old now. And let me tell you, as much as I miss her being little, I also love this season in her life. She's so chatty, sweet and smart.

First Day back to School! 2nd Grade here he comes!

Birthday Girl!

First Day back to School! 3rd Grade Girl!

Yard Sign provided by NWA Yard Greetings! Check them out on Facebook!

Happy Birthday! Balloons provided by The Party Place in Rogers.

A puppy Birthday! Cake provided from Harp's Bakery in Rogers.

Birthday celebration with family.

Making a big wish!

Invitations provided by JuneArborDesigns on Etsy

Second Husky Cake for party #2

Goodie Doggie Bowls: Cocoa puffs (puppy chow), stuffy, juice, bracelet (dog collar), scooby snacks
Dog Bowls from the Dollar Tree, Stuffy and collars from Amazon.

Painting party-can you guess what they are going to paint?

Sketching her art after canvas dried.

Will's puppy & Mary Kate's puppy. How cute are these?!

Friends artwork.

Thank you, Imagine Studios in Rogers for hosting our sweet girl and her friends!

A week after Mary Kate's Birthday was Ryan's 22nd Birthday. Yes, I said 22. How is that even possible?? Ryan actually surprised me on his Birthday and showed up at the house that morning to say HI and then later that afternoon we went out for a quick bite to eat and a drink. We talked goals, faith, family and future plans. Ryan is our Conan O'Brien doppelganger {twin}. He's funny, charming, sweet and just all round good guy. Don't let his tatoos fool you-he's a total teddy bear!

Our Birthday Man!

After all of the birthdays we then had our dear friends, Tom and Rachel, from Tulsa came to Arkansas for a visit and to kick off the first Razorback game with us and our neighbors! They bought a Mercedes Benz and they took us out for a night on the town in it and oh my goodness, it was AWESOME! Drives like a dream! I didn't drive it, I rode shotgun-but was the smoothest ride ever! Their sweet daughter, Elle, babysat for us while we went out and let me tell you, this girl is so precious to us. Her heart is so kind and loving and the kids just love her like a cousin! She always plays with them and makes it a fun night! Thank you, Elle, for always making them feel special!

Mercedes Benz Baby! So happy for Tom and Rachel and their new ride! 

Elle helping them figure out a video game. She is like a cousin to them. We just adore her!

And finally, but not least. August was also the 50th wedding anniversary of my in-laws and my Mom in laws birthday too. I can't tell you enough how much I love my in laws. They are an inspiration as a couple. Just like my parents are. They are funny, loving, light hearted, kind, and we wish we could have celebrated with them and put on a BIG party for them. My heart aches so much that we couldn't be there to do that for them. Because they deserve to be celebrated so much. And my Mom in Law is so incredible as a Mom, Wife and Nana to her grandkids. She is everything I want to be as Grandma when I grow older. She has so much energy for the kids and she makes things fun for them. She plays games with them, bakes for them, spends time with them and she is so funny and sweet. The kids and I love the time we get to spend with her. I am incredibly blessed to have her as my Mom in Law. Vickie, if you are reading this just know I love you to no end. You are one of the most talented, smartest and most beautiful women I know. You are a blessing to this family more than you know. I absolutely adore you and hope you had a beautiful birthday and even more beautiful anniversary. WE LOVE YOU!!!

Young and in love.

50 years of love and marriage.

An inspirational couple.

Happy Anniversary and Happy Birthday! We love you!!!!